what a day

i have so many things to say and no one to say them to.  i need a roommate and after-work cocktails.

Blind dating as set up by boys.

My coworkers are back to trying to set me up on blind dates.  There was this one incident that didn't happen - but almost did - with a coworker trying to set me up with a boy who looked 15.  Luckily i asked to see the pic first - unfortunately there was some coworker offense taken because of some childhood cancer causing puffy cheeks.  Everyone's had time to repair and now my other coworker wants me to go on a blind date with his friend.  His friend is a gospel rapper.  so.  there's that.  I feel like my coworkers simultaneously like and hate me.

Pre-Kiss Face

Why do boys always make that stupid face before they try and kiss you for the first time?  it's weird.

Neighborhood Shame

Since spring my mom's been jealous of the neighbor's lawn which was dandelion free.  Our lawn, on the other hand, was riddled with them.  For weeks my mom talked about how she wanted to spray the lawn to kill the dandelions so she finally told me about a month ago that she had bought spray. That weekend she just kept saying "I need to spray the lawn but I'm so tired".  So in an attempt to be helpful, I took the bottle and sprayed for her.   About two weeks later my dad asked me if I knew what had happened to the lawn.  I didn't know what he was talking about.  He took me out front and there it was.  A tie-dyed lawn. Green and Brown.  Turns out that I, like my mom, didn't read the bottle she purchased.  The bottle that said "weed and grass killer."  oops! 

Favor me this, favor me that.

Me:  Mom, what's the most fun part about living with your kid again?
Mom: Being able to do stuff for you.
Me: Seriously?!
Mom: Yeah
Me: That's so good!!  Cause the most fun part for me...other than using your makeup, is having you around to help me do stuff. Can you believe it!?  
Mom:  Oh, ha ha ha ha. That's so funny!
Me:  I know.  This is perfect!  ...Also, I'm supposed to make some treats for work tomorrow.. but I need to run tonight cause I slept in this morning... do you think you could help me?

my mom is such a mom! so nice.

A Mother's Request

My mom stopped me the other day.  She needed to talk.  She seemed upset.

M:  "Honey.  I love you.  And I know you're going to hate me for asking this....but I've kept it in for so long I just can't wait any longer"
Me: "Ok..."
M: "You're going to hate me"
Me: "Just say it, mom"
M: "Can you please make your bed in the morning?"
Me: laughter
M: "Your door was open today and it was just so messy seeming with an unmade bed"
Me: "Can I just keep my door closed?"
M:  "You should always make your bed. It makes you feel better when you enter the room"
Me: "Well when my bed is unmade it makes me feel better.  Like my bed is inviting me into it."
M: "*pplleeaassee. I think it's so much better made"
Me:  "Well how about I'll make my bed every morning  for you and before I come home at night you unmake it for me?"
M:  "Ok!"

TLW

Oh my boss's boss. You like basketball?  Wow, we have so much in common. I love basketball.  Oh you like history?  I find it just thrilling, don't you? 


* i don't actually like basketball or history.  but. i do like business men. 

A bargain

So, it's been a while.  March 24th my mom and i went to see the hunger games at the movie theatre.  my dad was sitting at home alone eating a sandwich. He has no recollection of the day but he got up mid-lunch, went for a walk toward the main street (the opposite direction he normally walks)  and just dropped dead.  An EMT happened to be driving by, he saw my dad collapse, pulled him out of the street, and did cpr for 6 minutes until an ambulance arrived.  They shocked his heart three times and got it started.  The concern at that point was brain damage so they induced a coma and did a cooling therapy on him for the next 36 hours.  It was a waiting game to find out if he'd wake up fine, wake up with brain damage, or not wake up.  once that 36 hr waiting period was passed, he began to wake up slowly over the course of  the day. he had signs of brain damage the day after that. and he was fine, except totally uninhibited and nothing like his usual self, the day after that.  He had minor heart surgery two days later and is perfectly healthy and back to normal now.  He's also lost lots of weight since being released and cared for by his wonderful daughter!   Ask me the nutritional information on anything.

So.  Now.  Let's talk a little more about that two week period of time post coma when he was physically ok but mentally a weirdo.  The doctors said that all of there patients who have had that cooling therapy are kind of wild for a while after.  They said a lot of those patients run around the hospital totally unashamed and naked and are often trying to kiss the nurses.  My dad was a milder version of that.  But he got strange ideas in his head and couldn't let them go.

My favorite was that God couldn't let him die because I'm still single.  He decided that his nurse was the man for me.  My dad asked him a lot of invasive questions and made eyebrow-raising faces at me.  He asked all the other nurses about him and if they thought he would want to date me.  He told me to go home and change into a shirt so my tattoos showed so that the nurse (who had sleeves) would know that I'm into similar things as him.  He wrote me a three page letter explaining why I should date him.  He included coupons I could use on our (theoretical) date.  He asked another nurse for her phone number in case he needed to get more information about him after being released.  And about a week after being home from the hospital, he wrote a letter to the hospital, telling them to tell this nurse that he had a single daughter he could have for one goat and two chickens.

Super Fun

Everything's been super fun lately.

1. Vacation to canada!  it was nice to be around an old friend. nice to drink drinks and make new friends. And two near engagements reinvigorated my canadian house wife dreams. 

2. This week the weather has been beautiful (although today it was a little warm at 79) and I've been given the keys to the SUV  (don't worry, it's a hybrid)  to enjoy it.  I guess most people like walking and sitting in the sun but i don't like being hot - so i like driving with the windows down, music loud, and trying to find waterfront.

3. Buffalo party.  My friend Jamie from philly! and korea! and hong kong! is back in america.  She's doin' her rounds and wants to see herself some niagra falls.  So next week i'm picking her up from the airport and we're going to spend a few days watching water fall, staying up till 4am, eating delicious foods and reliving my life circa 2002.

4. Upcoming train rides to visit everyone coming soon.

Memory

In all seriousness, both uncles of my mother's and her own mother have been diagnosed with Alzheimers.  Her memory has progressively gotten worse and worse and we're all a little leery that she's headed in that direction.  This memory issue is no good for her, obviously, but it's also caused a lot of conflict with her giving me the same advice over and over and over again. And with her sending me the dumbest email forwards multiple times a week/month/year.  Unlucky me, I know.

So today, in reference to my trip tomorrow:

Mom:   Is there anything possible between you and this boy in Canada
Me: No mom, you asked me this the other day.
Mom: I did?  What did  you say
Me: I said no.  We're just friends
Mom:  Well sometimes friendship turns in to something more...
Me:  *laughing laughing laughing*  i love you mom.

oh canada

Me:  Mom, do you think you could drop me off at the greyhound station friday? i'm gonna go to toronto for the weekend.
Mom: Sure sweetie, who are you going to see?
Me: My friend tyler who i taught with my first year in korea
Mom: Is tyler a boy?
Me: Yes
Mom: Do you like him?
Me: Not like that, we're just friends
Mom:  Ok, just keep an open mind...wink wink..
Me: You don't even know him. What if he's awful?
Mom:  Well...

Blogjects

I've got so many blog ideas.  I need to treat them like a job and start making them happen.
I want to do three things.

1.  start back up on my list blog.  i need to start making more lists.  which means i need to start socializing to get inspired.  today i hung out with an old friend.  it made me excited to do things.  good hangouts are like dancing in your room to good music.

2. turn this into a blog that predominantly tells of the dating advice i get from my parents.  cause it's pretty on the regular. and stupid.

3.  if  the show "to catch a predator" and  "punk'd" made a baby it would be my craigslist internet hobby; which i really should start blogging about so the world can see how creepy and awful everyone online is.

3.5  i need a good blog name for #3

my mom just woke up

I can't sleep.  It's 5am and I haven't been to bed yet.  This might be the fourth day this week.  Probably the 20th in the last month.  I can't wait for health insurance and ambien.
I've spent these quiet hours looking at teaching jobs in korea and they are looking good right now.  This tends to happen after spending some time on fb looking at people's vacation pictures. oh, you got your scuba certification on holiday in the Philippians? how nice.  oh you guys got engaged in Thailand.. there? on that so-beautiful-it-looks fake-in-the-pictures-island?  cool.  Oh that's you on a train in india with jokes about that movie?  funny.  Yes, Bali does look wonderful, how nice for you.

I think it's time to get serious about some pros and cons lists.

  

Broken Hands

I usually make dinner to be ready for my parents when they get home from work. Today I had borrowed my mom's car which meant picking her up from work, and in turn not having dinner made.  So just after walking in the door with my mom, and my dad getting home steps behind us, a friend called me.  yes, it's true. i have a friend.  so about an hour later i realize that my parents have been sitting in the kitchen talking the entire time i've been on the phone.. ..  waiting.. with their broken hands (only logical explanation)  for me to come downstairs and make them dinner.   my parents are getting spoiled.

Re-do

Being in Rochester again feels like someone pressed rewind and took me back to 1999.  Going to the mall, where I worked in college to get plugs (lost one swimming) from hot topic and being hit on by the 19 year old working all contribute to this feeling of deja vu.   now i just need my k-car, a boyfriend, and more road trips to buffalo.

Hair for sue

Every time I wear these glasses my dad tells me that he can take me to the eye doctors to get a new prescription and he'll buy me some new frames.  He probably told me ten times when I said, "dad, i get that you think my glasses are ugly, but i don't need new ones and i actually like these ones"  and he responded, "it's not that they are ugly, you're just... well, you look so much better without them...when you wear them, you just don't look like you want to get married and i love you and i want the best for you."  

Every day is a day

There are so many good and bad things always happening within moments of each other.  It's weird how that happens.  How one minute you are laughing and happy and later you are alone in a car with sad music playing in what seems to be a completely abandoned world.

Speaking of good and bad....

After growing my hair long (for the first time since 2nd grade) for three years and getting nothing but trims I was ready for an actual hairstyle/cut.    It turns out I liked my long hair more than I thought.

I watched a lot of unfinished animated student films at RIT this weekend.  They were mostly bad.  However, I also watched a completed live action thesis "memoir-parody" of our friend's about his job working in tech services. Hopefully someday it will be available to the internet.  it was really good.   I also got to see old friends and celebrate F. Brown's birthday.  All good. 


No tv and no eating out has meant a lot of together time.  We went wii bowling as a family this week,  we also played a new card game,  we talked about god,  my mom and i tried all her workout dvds - fail,  i've read the news everyday and i know things that are happening, and we watched a movie - j.edgar - we thought it was more about the fbi than his sexuality but we were wrong.

Giving up

Today I asked my parents when lent was and suggested we partake as a household.  Apparently I'm a little late (and obviously not catholic) but we're in.  We're giving up eating out and tv.   OMG.  I mean, I'm unemployed, car-less and my membership to the ymca just ended.  What am I going to do all day!?    I guess the valentines day cards I made for you all will finally get addressed and put into the mailbox.  

Update

Since writing the post below, i feel very unsettled about america and want to go back to korea.

(i do not know what is wrong with me but i can not sleep!)

Home home home

So after living abroad and having a terrible year, I'm home.  It's good to be home.  A lot of really simple things make me happy again. The following things fit in to this category:

Cable tv
Target
Wegmans
Hanging out with people I love
Hugs
Cheese
Being able to ask questions
Getting informative answers
Driving a car
Driving a car while listening to the radio
A dry bathroom floor
Fountain soda
Holiday decorations
Shopping
Boxed wine
Swimming in a pool
Possibilities


So it's been about five weeks since I've come back to the states and three since I've been at my parents house.  They're being really amazing and trying really hard to make this an easy transition for me.  They're doing a wonderful job.  That being said, it's really hard not having a space of my own without having an end in sight.  I want so much to be better at being patient.  Until I am though, I will just enjoy the tiny things.